On Having Private Conversations In Public Spaces

Some things are better kept private.

I was in the pet store minding my own business (which, I must admit, can be a bit of a challenge for me at times). Suddenly, my ears perked up when I overheard the conversation happening behind me.

Boy: "Mom, why are they cutting his _______ off?" He was talking about the upcoming neutering of his male dog and did not know how to say it! I laughed to myself because my children also used to ask me awkward questions in public places.

Mom: "We don't want (I don't remember the name of their female dog) to have puppies."

Boy: "Well, when they do that, will he still be a boy?" Ohhhhhh," I thought to myself, "Is this whole debate going to be settled right here in the middle of the pet store?" I tried to lean in without making it obvious.

Mom: "No, she just won't be able to have puppies."

Boy: "Mommy, will someone do that to me when I get older?" I wanted to turn to him and say, "You have no idea!" But I didn't. I just tried to listen closer.

That's when I heard a voice.

Clerk (at another register): "Sir, (motioning to me) I can take you over here!"

Dang. Now, I had a full-blown conundrum. I don't like waiting in lines, but I must admit that for a split second, I thought about allowing someone else to go in front of me so I could hear the conclusion of this conversation.

Regrettably, I left the mother and the young boy, knowing their conversation was about to get even more interesting!

I give the mom a lot of credit for trying her best to quell his curiosity until she could find a more appropriate venue to have this awkward conversation. But respectfully, he was a kid, and kids are often good at asking questions that lead to uncomfortable conversations in public places.

It's not like children are the only ones who have these critical conversations in public places. It's just that theirs are far more innocent. I've seen a lot of adults having awkward conversations in public places, usually over the phone. Sometimes, I can only hear one side. Other times, they have a full-blown, what should be private conversation about their finances, relationships, and what they did the night before (and with whom!), and it's all on speakerphone for God, the universe, and everyone else to hear.

Maybe it’s just me, but it seems that public spaces aren’t the place for private conversations, whether on the phone or otherwise. Remember, others are listening. There are prying ears (okay, I may confess to a bit of guilt here!) But then again, with the continued onslaught of social media, we take pictures of our food, show everyone where our party is, and let the whole world know that we finally got that colonoscopy we've been putting off! Some even upload post-surgical conversations with others who are still feeling the impacts of anesthesia. By the way, keep those coming. They're hysterical!

I also admit I have been guilty in the past, especially when Facebook and X (formerly known as Twitter) first became a thing. But I've gone to work to stay more in the moment and capture those memories for me and those I love rather than post them for others who may not care. I did that on a recent trip. I turned off my notifications and figured out how to use an autoreply to the text messages I received and let people know I wasn't available. That was a first for me.

Everyone doesn't have to know everything you're doing, every place you've been, or every procedure (ahem!) you're having done. Sharing private conversations and moments in public spaces may garner you some attention. But in the end, it could result (just as I realized) in paying less attention to the important things happening right in front of you.